The HB and I went to his friends house to watch the fiesta bowl yesterday. We arrived early and were looking at the pictures on his wall when he told us that he recently had to take down some pictures, pictures of the ex-girlfriend.
I said: "You sure don't want those around when the new girlfriend comes over."
He agreed: "Not that there's a new girlfriend, but I learned a long time ago that girlfriends should never see anything at all related to an ex-girlfriend."
Thank you! I felt validated. I've had a painful week for many reasons, but part of it was due to my hypersensitivity to ex-girlfriend paraphernalia. While I'll admit I may be overly jealous and I know I'm too sensitive, it DOES make me feel better that I am not the only girl who doesn't like this kind of thing. I understand keeping in touch, but what I don't like knowing is: that one was a dancer, this one was a singer, this one is an actress, this one is a model, etc, etc. Maybe it's because my list looks like this: this one was a juvenile delinquent, this one was a porn addict, this one was a player, this one was completely unmotivated, etc., in which case, it seems totally reasonable to have moved on. But in his case it doesn't, and even knowing that he loves me doesn't help me see why he moved on. So I ask, only to know really why it ended, maybe hoping for him to say he has no regrets about it ending. And my asking makes us both uncomfortable, but sometimes I just have to, especially when there are reminders everywhere.
At least now he may know I'm not the only mashochistic female. Men's Health published an article a few years ago, a list of 30 things all women did that their man didn't know about (the article is based on a poll, and I'm sure all women don't do all of these things). Number 7 says: "I have Googled your exes." This just seems like more evidence that all women may wonder about their lover's exes, despite the unhealthiness of those thoughts. I liked the movie Closer because it dealt with that in a way movies have been afraid to before and people have been and are afraid to. I was nervous to watch it with the HB so I watched it alone, but liked it so much that I don't think I'd mind now.
It felt good to not feel like such a freakishly sensitive girl for a while.
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3 comments:
dude, i don't know if this makes a difference but, you're the only girl the family has ever really liked. believe me, we talk. tyler can tell you this too, i hated melissa, even before her and ty dated. i don't know why, i just did. ty loves you and the exes have absolutely nothing on you!
peace out girl scout.
i just thought of something else. when brock and i were dating and 1st married i was hung up on a girl that brock liked before he went on his mission. he even called me by her name once. ouch! her and i were so different. she was like brock. very good and strict and spiritual, a future prophets wife. i was not. don't get me wrong, i was spiritual and i had a testimony, but i didn't carry my scriptures everywhere i went and i didn't wear flowery dresses to church. anyway, it's a thorn in my side, we've hashed it out so many times. brock always wanted to marry a girl like that and he even admits it still. ouch. whatever. i just have to keep telling myself that i'm a good catch and it's his fault that he married me. haha. my boyfriend past wasn't roses either. that bothered brock too for some reason. it's not like he had to date them.
brock has definately gotten better over time. when it all comes down to it, i know he loves ME. i hate beinng compared to other girls. i'm the only me in the world, and that's good enough.
i'm not quite sure where i'm going with this so i'll just end it now.
peace out.
thanks Amanda, it feels good to know I'm not alone in this.
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